When the wheels of the plane lifted from the ground I sat back, took a deep breath and let it all fall away behind me. Tuesday was a good day, a great day even, if you allow that it was a day of tears and tremendous release for me. If you allow that a good long cry can be a great thing. All the stresses and emotions of late have built up and built up and I noticed but couldn't get the darned bubble inside to burst. Even with lots of thought, talk and understanding, emotions, the feelings themselves require their own time. And puffy-eyed as I was on Wednesday, the smile on my face was undeniable. Whew, what a release.
And now, now I'm writing from a very chilly London. It's gray and damp and foggy and stereotypically London today and for me that's just perfectly fine. I'm staying with a colleague who is also a friend and we enjoyed pizza, champagne and a roaring fire in her living room last night. We chatted like school girls and gossiped about work and was that pizza ever good. Not my typical Thanksgiving, but my life is all about redefining normal these days.
So, with the sadness and the grieving, I also have an eye toward the day and the experiences. I am learning that all these emotions can and will co-exist. They add to my character as they are woven into the whole of me. In short, they are part of life. And the gratitude part of the Thanksgivng yesterday was not lost on me. I'm very thankful indeed as I have much to be thankful for. And you and I both know it.