Thursday, May 05, 2005

Carry on

Okay, I admit it. I have been one overwhelmed, stressed, emotional excuse of a person lately. Where did my inner Pollyanna go? Who kicked her out when I wasn't looking? [Note to her: I'd like you to come back, okay? And soon.] I am very good at seeing the positive, at recognizing and accepting challenges. Honestly, although you'd be pressed to find it around here, I'm a silver-lining kind of gal. To a fault. Normally, it's not me who collapses beneath the load, throws in the towel, cries in her pillow, whines about the burden. I'm the one who more than one friend starts their opposing position sentence with, "I know that you like to see the good in things, but..." or, "I know you like to see the good in people, but..." And then they'll load up their argument but I typically don't buy it. So, how then, did I manage to buy it all on my very own? Not sure. But I went on my walk this morning and looked around me at all the ever-present things I so love, breathed the air and stretched my arms before the rising sun, and I saw good again. And I had hope again. And it felt great to have this reunion with who I am. All the problems and worries and what-to-dos are still there, no magic eraser swooped down and cleared that mess up, but I threw desperation down the gutter, and invited inspiration back in. The room is the same, but the company is much much better.

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