Sunday, March 06, 2005

Duh?

Hello? Is this on? I'd like to announce that I realized something this afternoon. I can do this. How about that? It's not going to be easy, but who said it would be, or should be? I am not going to be without pain, but how in the world would I ever be excused from the pain? It simply does not work that way. I do have a long journey ahead of me, health-wise, and I do have a plate full of problems that have to be tackled and resolved when it comes to my family. But I am able to do these things. Nothing at all is going to change in the next five minutes. It's going to take time. I have that. And I have all the lessons I've ever learned, all the advice I've been given, all the love ever handed over to me with encouragement. I have it! I was not left without the guidance. And I have faith. It occurs to me that this is the time to use these things. I have realized this and in that epiphany, I realized the tiniest light burning within me and it may have been there before and I way too up in it all to see it, but I do see it now, and I feel it burning. And it's good. It's a start, a first step. And here my journey begins.

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